Many of us have gotten into a negative mindset. As though a dark cloud is following us everywhere we go.
Bad drivers, long line-ups, tight schedules and overwork have many people in modern society feeling exhausted and depressed.
We tend to lash out by expressing our frustration and we’re not shy about expressing our discontent to others.
But something else, beyond plain disgust with the way things are, is going on inside of us.
And it may surprise you.
Psychologists say our complaining is a way to seek sympathy.
All of us are looking for love, but getting it is increasingly difficult in a world too busy to care.
Voice our displeasures, hard-done-by stories and complaints – loud enough and forcefully enough – in a misguided attempt to seek out this reaction: “Oh, poor you. Let me come and comfort you.”
The problem of course is that this seldom works.
The people who hear our complaints have their own set of concerns, dislikes and desires to be heard.
The result is that nobody is listening to anyone.
Being human, we keep repeating the same tactic, despite the fact that, in the words of the great Albert Einstein – doing the same thing over and over while expecting a different result is insanity.
There is a compounding effect of seeing negativity all around us: it serves to fuel our inner most fears. This, in turn, heightens anxiety and transforms us into a nastier version of who we really are.
A negative outlook, in other words, feeds on itself, to the point where even a pencil sitting on a desk is viewed as a burden. “Get that thing out of the way of my papers!”
We’ve all witnessed people seemingly upset over the tiniest things.
How can we turn it around? A few thoughts.
- Seek solace inside: Finding comfort in the outside world is increasingly futile. There is only one person you can truly count on, and that is you. Learn to enjoy spending time with yourself. Realize that you are your own best friend. And yes – start treating yourself better. Love yourself.
- Look at things from 10,000 feet up. When we fly in a jet plane and look down on planet earth, we may think to ourselves “Look at all of those little people down there running around like crazy. What fools!” When you feel like lashing out at the world, look at it from a different perspective – from 10,000 feet in the air. From up there, things don’t look so bad. And often, they just look silly and can bring a smile to our face.
- Practice acceptance: It’s amazing how quickly our viewpoint changes when the fight in us stops and we just accept what is. If you can accept, and laugh at the chaos, you will be so much stronger. And feel a whole lot better too.
- Be that ray of sunshine: Decide to take on a new role for yourself. Instead of being upset and disgruntled like everyone else – put on a smile (even if you have to force it), talk about the bright side of things and resist complaining. You will quickly become the most attractive person in the room. Guaranteed.
The world has an abundance of negativity and doesn’t need more of it.
Be good to yourself, see things from the sky, accept, and become the light in the crowd.