Most people say I love you and expect the other person to say it back. But that’s the wrong reason to say it.
If we truly love someone, we’ll express that love without expecting love in return.
Doing a kind deed without waiting for something back is equally rare. It is that rarity which makes unconditional giving so powerful, with unexpected results.
Giving for giving’s sake
Giving unconditionally is a shock to people. Giving your time, expertise, wisdom – a helping hand, especially to a stranger or someone you’ve just met, is just not done in today’s world where time is finite.
If you do it, you’ll be met with blank stares, disbelief, questions about what you want, and tears.
It’s that rare. It’s that powerful.
Can it be real?
A popular video (4 million views) on YouTube shows a man pretending to be homeless, and when given some change turns around to give that person a $20 bill. The giver is, of course, in shock.
Unconditional giving shows that you care, that you are genuine, down to earth and loving.
But, as in the YouTube video, it is so unusual, many people may distrust you, until time proves your sincerity.
Giving unconditionally does not mean that nothing ever comes back to you. In many cases, nothing will. But in some cases, unexpected returns do take hold, like these:
- Long-term relationships of mutual support.
- A customer for life.
- Word of mouth marketing.
- Loyalty from others.
The key is not to expect any of these things. One thing you should expect, however, is to feel good.
Helping two people, not one
The primary reason to give unconditionally is to help another person. But a secondary reason is to make yourself feel good, and there’s nothing at all wrong with that. Because, now, you’ve helped two people. The other person, and you.
While you expect no monetary and materialistic return, giving of yourself will:
- Improve your mood;
- Confirm that you’ve accomplished something in this life;
- Allow you to love yourself;
- Give you purpose;
- Show you the best of yourself; and
- Give you inspiration.
All of these benefits are extraordinarily helpful in your personal life, career or business.
Give unconditionally to someone this week
Help put an end to the “what’s in it for me” syndrome by doing someone a good turn this week. Whether it’s giving to a homeless person on the way to work, buying lunch for a co-worker, or sending someone helpful information for their career in an email – the act may be small but it could well be remembered for a lifetime.